All Time Low
by xGeminiGirlx
Summary: "You could have any man in Albion." "No I couldn't..." "Excuse me?" "I can't have you."  Merlin/Morgana. Spoilers from season 2. Read and review!


**Yep, me. With a Mergana one-shot which I'm not all that happy about. But meh, reviews always convince me otherwise. I'd love for you to review if you read this, even if you didn't think it that great. :)**

**I think they're a bit OC in this, but I'm absolutely shattered and it's only a drabble I wrote because of a spark of inspiration.**

**Enjoy! All spelling mistakes are mine!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own.**

"_Merlin…"_

Merlin stirred lightly in his sleep, mumbling something under his breath, tossing and turning as he was pulled from his dreams by the melody of a voice.

"_Merlin."_

The voice became louder, calling him as he came into consciousness, opening his eyes and sitting up slowly. He recognized the voice, the calling, the beautiful tone that would make any man's heart melt. Morgana.

"_Merlin!"_

The calling became a shout, and he shot out of his small uncomfortable bed and onto the floor, scrambling clumsily to his feet and flying through his chambers, careful not to wake Gaius as he fled out of the door.

"_Please!"_

By now he was running. His body was betraying him; he didn't quite know what he was doing really, his mind was a blur. But next thing he knew he was outside Morgana's chambers, only dressed in his trouser nightwear, his milky chest exposed to the cool midnight air. He was surprised that he hadn't seen many guards around, especially outside Morgana's chambers.

"_Merlin!"_

That roar inside his head made Merlin barge open the door, looking worried. She was asleep on the bed.

The door falling closed automatically behind him, he rushed to her side at the bed. She was still asleep, tossing and turning in an unsettled manner, the bracelet from her wrist gone. This was the first bad dream she'd had in nights.

"Please, Merlin, don't d-do it! Plea-se! It's-it's not me! Merlin, it's not me I swear! Please do-don't! Merlin!"

He looked extremely confused at her rambling sleep talk, perching on the edge of the bed and taking her ivory hand, unfortunately not calming her in the slightest as she continued to restlessly fidget.

He figured this didn't look good, with him being the Prince's manservant an her the Lady Morgana, as he was by her bed holding her hand as she slept.

"Merlin… p-please… I-I need you! Don't let this-is happen! No! No! No! M-Mer-Merlin! MERLIN!"

She suddenly screamed, the long sound enough to pierce eardrums, sending shocks quaking down Merlin's spine. She jumped up to sit bolt right, physically trembling as she sweated. Her skin dampened even more as tears collected with the beads of sweat covering her skin, choking on her own sobs and gasping for air, her hands on her throat like she was suffocating, like she couldn't breathe.

"Milady! Morgana?" Merlin said worriedly, wrapping his arms around her form comfortingly, protectively, locking securely around her body.

"Get off me! GET OFF ME!" She screamed, physically shaking and terrified, hitting him on the chest and toppling backwards, nearly falling off the bed if it weren't for Merlin's arms still holding her. He was surprised how strong he really was. Even with all her struggling he managed to hang on tight.

"Morgana, it's okay, it was only a dream." He cooed softly, pulling her close as she gave up the fight, letting her cry into his chest. He ran his fingers through her dark locks, sitting on the bed so they were both comfortable, letting her curl into him as she continued to sob.

He must have been sitting there for about 5 minutes before Morgana had quietened. He hesitated running his fingers through her hair, stopping completely, going to withdraw before he was stopped by her voice.

"Don't stop…" Her voice was a hiccup of a sob, inching her way up his chest, only just noticing that he had no shirt on and his skin was wet from her crying, Morgana resting her head on his shoulder and nuzzling her head into the crook of his neck.

He nodded lightly, stunned by her actions but he knew better then to take advantage of her in a moment like this, combing his fingers through her luscious raven hair again, soothing her more then she could ever had imagined. She loved it.

"What happened?" He whispered after a while, feeling her stiffen and mould herself against him, noticing the tears on his neck. She gulped, shivering at the same time from fear, inhaling his scent.

"I died…" She whispered after a moment, closing her eyes, her eyelashes brushing his neck. He nodded. Normal dreams weren't like that, and he felt sympathy for his friend.

"Why were you calling me?" He asked softly.

"I… don't remember calling you…" He could feel her eyebrows knit together in confusion, but he shook it off. Maybe it was her magic? Of course it was, she wouldn't have been able to talk to him in his mind without it, it was so simple. But surely her magic couldn't talk without her ordering it to do so…

"Was I in your dream?" He asked softly, and she nodded, and he felt her cling tightly on to him. "What did I do?"

"You… you… you killed me…" She trembled, her eyes filling with tears. Her nightmares were bad, yes, and it almost killed her when she woke, yes. But it was never this bad. She never broke down to anyone but Gwen. But Merlin was… different. He was special. And for some strange reason she trusted him.

He paused for too long, and Morgana withdrew from him, looking him in the face as a fresh batch of tears leaked from her orbs.

He looked confused as he stared into her captivating eyes.

"It was only a dream." He concluded finally, quietly, his voice not even sounding sure. But she shook her head.

"You know it's not, Merlin. You know what it is." Her voice quietened, looking around as if she was afraid of her own room, before back to him. "It's my magic."

"Morgana, it's a common nightmare, nothing to worry a-"

"NO IT'S NOT MERLIN!" She screamed, grabbing his shoulders and shaking him roughly.

"Morgana, Morgana, calm down…" He gently took both of her hands, his thumbs running over the top of her skin near her knuckles as she took a shaky breath.

"I can't, Merlin. _This_ is going to happen - you're going to kill me. I'm going to die, poisoned, and I did _nothing _wrong!" She didn't tell him that she didn't care if she died or not, that the only reason this scared her so much was that he broke her heart.

"I promise you, Morgana, I promise that I won't kill you. I swear to you on my life. You're my friend - I wouldn't do that-"

"But you did! You will!"

"I won't!"

"You'll have no choice, Merlin! It was me or Camelot. Everyone will die! Morgause… Morgause set the curse on me!" Morgana's eyes widened as she realized what her dreams were telling her. "And you fell for it! You-You killed me because of what Morgause done!" He bottom lip quivered, her breathing becoming heavy again as she looked him straight in the eyes. "And it was all my fault…"

"How was it you fault?" He asked attentively, his tone soft and… loving? No, it must just be her imagination.

She looked away for a moment, thinking it over, her eyes scanning the distance like she was reading. After a moment she slowly looked back to Merlin, her face paler then it was a few seconds ago.

"Morgause told me to meet her in the woods. She sent me a message… I went. Then… then I agreed that I wanted Uther's downfall and-and… she tricked me. She planted a curse on me… then I woke up and everyone was falling sick…

Merlin, this is going to happen soon!"

"Do you know when?"

"No…"

"Morgana, if you're going to prevent this, you can't go and meet Morgause. Don't agree to anything." Merlin was worried, it was clear in his eyes and expression. And that got Morgana started again.

"Merlin... You wouldn't, I'm your friend. Just don't poison me. You wouldn't kill me, I'm your friend, I lov- You would kill me wouldn't you?" Morgana snapped suddenly, looking him square in the face, her eyes ablaze with anger. When Merlin stay quiet she looked outraged.

"You scoundrel! You _would_ kill me for Camelot! What, aren't I a good enough friend for you _Merlin_? Don't I meet up to your standards? Am I not pretty enough for you to show me some respect? Merlin, you're the only person I can trust around here…" She paused, her bottom lip quivering delicately again, determined not to let the tears flow, "please, I don't want to loose you. I don't know what would happen if I did."

It had only just hit Merlin how much Morgana needed him. How much she needed the security around her, how much she needed somebody to trust, someone to take the fear from her and help her sleep without nightmares, someone who she could rely on to speak to about anything, somebody to love and cherish her. Wait… love? Now this was going too far and too deep.

"I should go." Was all he managed, trying to get himself out of this mess that he'd inadvertently got himself tangled in.

"Please, stay with me." She whispered, grabbing his hand, a fearful expression flittering across her beautiful features as he tried to withdraw.

"I'm sorry, milady, but I can't. I've got to be up early for Arthur. I should really go, you'll be fi-" He was cut off as she crashed her lips onto his, her arms wrapping around his neck and pulling him down on top of her, her fingers getting tangled in his lush dark hair.

He didn't respond at first, stunned for a moment, until her tongue found it's way into his mouth and he finally let all the passion he was concealing out. The kiss as a whole was very sloppy and violent, their lips moving so fast that they could barely control them, Morgana moaning as her hands ran down over his surprisingly firm chest.

She could feel the sensation of electricity shoot through her body, her chest bubbling up as her heart thumped loudly, her hands sliding their way around his back to squash him on top of her. She couldn't help but cry out as he pulled his lips away from hers, but all of that pain soon faded as she felt his soft lips on her neck. Oh god, she was in _heaven._

Her breath got caught in her throat, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as she closed her eyes, her lips parting in pleasure as he pressed open mouthed kisses to her neck. She could feel something stirring in her lower stomach which made her grumble, her fingers locking in his hair, her mind going elsewhere as the beautiful sensations made her shiver with excitement.

"Merlin…" She whispered, her voice wavering softly.

Merlin froze where he was, shock suddenly shooting through him, and Morgana's eyes slowly opened as fear spread through her like wildfire.

"Merlin?" He withdrew quickly, springing away from the Lady and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, looking at her through big eyes full of shock. She sat up, her raven locks falling down her shoulder, looking flustered and… gorgeous. She swallowed deeply as Merlin spoke.

"This is so wrong."

"Do you regret it?" She asked timidly, her eyes flashing with curiosity as she scrambled to her feet, Merlin in turn stepping back.

"Yes." He answered simply, and she had to ignore the feeling of disappointment creeping through her soul. She could see he was lying, or hoped in fact.

"Merlin…" She mumbled softly, stepping closer to him and taking his hands, "please… stay with me tonight." _Love me_ her mind whispered.

"No, My Lady, I'm sorry." He ripped his hands away from hers, turning and fleeing hurriedly to the door. Her eyes stung as she tried to fight the bite of rejection. She'd never been rejected of anything by other men before, apart from Uther, and it was a different experience. Especially since she was rejected my a _servant._

She wasn't going to give up any time soon.

Dashing to the exit she stood in front of it, shutting the door Merlin had opened slightly. With her back pressed against the wood she used all her weight to stop him from pulling it open. She was acting ridiculous, she knew that. But she couldn't help it. She needed to know why he rejected her. Why he can't _love_ her - what was she doing wrong?

"Merlin, please…" She mumbled, begging him for the millionth time that night, looking up into his clear blue eyes, internally melting.

"Yes, milady?" His voice was distant, she noticed in a heart-aching manner.

"What did I do wrong?" Her voice was quiet, looking ashamed of herself, glancing down to the floor. She could hear Merlin fumbling with his words, finally setting on a conclusion.

"Nothing, milady." Her eyes shot up to him then, and he had to try to forget the unshed tears glittering in her gaze.

"Liar." She declared, blinking as the tears spilled rapidly from her orbs, finally granting him access to the door as she pushed past him, "I'll never be good enough for you."

She fled over to her mirror, examining her face, the curves of her body. Was she that ugly? Maybe it was her eyes? Or… or it could be she was putting on some weight?

When she heard the wooden door open she finally broke down, collapsing in a heap on the floor, sobs wracking her whole body as she choked, trembling as her hands shook. She cried out in anguish, her hands flying to hold her face as it fell parallel the floor, her knees folding under her. She could only really make out her door closing and she choked again, getting herself in a real state, her hair sticking to her sweaty neck. She poured her heart out, and it was so painful…

…Until she felt arms wrap around her waist and she was pulled up onto _his_ lap and she folded easily into his arms, clutching his shoulders with her nails, her face pressed so hard into his chest that she was scared that he'd break.

Her crying and sobbing went on for a long _long_ time, in which she'd thrown up a couple of times and he'd held back her silky locks and helped her rinse her mouth out before she clung to him again. At least an hour this event had lasted, she suspected. But Merlin stayed with her throughout her breakdown, whispering nonsense in her ear and stroking down her back in comfort, rocking her gently; her emotions were tarring her apart. He had muttered that she wasn't alone and spilled his secret that he too had magic, but she wasn't at all surprised.

"I just want… somebody to-to… love me…" She choked out finally, her eyes saw and stinging, her throat dry and croaky. She'd never cried so hard in her life, even after her father's death. It didn't feel like _this. _It was just so unnatural, so unlike Morgana, that she contemplated if she was enchanted. She was normally so cocky but now she was self-conscious.

"There's Arthur… Gwen… _Uther…_" Merlin responded quietly, and Morgana scoffed, her voice muffled by his chest.

"Arthur has Gwen and Gwen has Arthur - they don't need anyone else. And-and Uther doesn't care for any magical being. Merlin, if he knew my powers, he'd have me killed!" Merlin left that subject with her words.

"You could have any man in Albion." He tried.

"No I couldn't…" She whispered, her hand slipping down and balling over his thudding heart. She couldn't bring herself to smile. He looked down at her for the first time, his gaze questioning. She was the most beautiful woman around, how couldn't she?

"Excuse me?" She looked up to him then, their gazes locking as she spoke, her voice gaining some strength.

"I can't have you." A tear would fall from her eye but she had none left. She had already cried so much over a boy. Merlin frowned.

"Why would you want _me_?" It didn't really make sense. She could get a wealthy good-looking noble who could give her riches and power and everything she desired; Merlin could give her nothing.

There was a long silence between them, before finally Morgana found her voice again, sitting up in his lap so she could look at him in the eyes.

"Because, Merlin, for some stupid reason which I'll never understand, I admire you greatly. Your clumsiness, your ears, your smile, your voice, your compassion, your _love_ - it's all I want." When he looked confused, she smiled faintly, a light blush surfacing on her cheeks but she never broke eye contact with him.

"I love you."

There was silence for a long while and Morgana couldn't bare to look at a face of rejection for a second time, finding the floor an attractive thing to stare at, taking a deep breath before she whispered.

"You can go now." But Merlin didn't budge, and when she looked up to him, his lips were smothering hers softly. She closed her eyes, but it was just a brush of the lips and a quick kiss. She found her eyelids getting heavy when she put her head on his shoulder, curling up delicately on his lap as he lifted her up, making his way clumsily over to the bed. Tripping more times then normal he managed to get to the bed without any harm.

Once in her bed she shuffled lazily to the edge of her pillow, leaving a large empty space next to her as she looked up to him, smiling slightly as he slipped in beside her.

"Ooft…" He mumbled, grinning in a childish fashion, "I wish I had a bed like this. Luxury." She smiled at that, turning on her side so her back was to him. What? She wasn't exactly used to things like this.

"Goodnight, Morgana."

"Night Merlin…" She whispered, already starting to fall asleep. She was physically exhausted from all the crying.

Merlin's hand snaked around her waist, interlocking his fingers with hers, pressing his back up against hers as he pulled the cover up so she was nice and warm. She in turn squeezed his hand and shuffled back into him, her eyes still closed. His breath tickled the back of her neck as he nuzzled his face into her lush sweet-smelling hair.

She didn't care about Uther or magic or status or nightmares or destiny - it could all go to hell. All she wanted was for Merlin to never leave her… she wanted to be in his arms forever. And she wouldn't allow any crap like destiny to get in the way of her burning love for him.

She felt her magic mingle freely with his, sending a buzz through her spine, her last conscious thought were his words. Merlin's words. The man that was behind her, nuzzling his face into her hair, his words filling her eardrums like a lullaby which sent her into an easy and peaceful sleep.

"I love you Morgana…"

**Aww, nice ending. I didn't want any more heart break - review?**


End file.
